SLIME LORD

Apocalypse Now, and Always

when i was a younger man i came to a fruitful realization about a truth
so unalienable, so blatant,
that it might as well have been beamed down from the cosmos
onto a billboard that says “you can get the combo for 4.99!!!”
this truth is as follows:

WE ARE ALL GONNA FUCKING DIE!

i don’t yet fully understand time but i do know that it is something that flies,
 and if it flies it dies, therefore it’s also something you can kill.
 i know that about 1600 kids are diagnosed with cancer every year,
no, i don’t believe your astrological sign being a cancer has any effect on how we interract. i know that even if you are in the best shape you’ve ever been in and are having the time of your life,
 your life only has so much time.
and i don’t know how many fucking hours i’ve spent absorbing pop culture factoids.

how do we keep up with the kardashians while also putting up with ourselves?
i know there has to be some affect from this on our collective mental health

this is the apathetic generation in the fast food nation, crying while masturbating over spilled milk and Freudian slips
there are places where people are actually cut in two pieces by machetes
and so far it’s been over two months and i’m still not over cutting ties with a girl that i let into my heart.
a lot of the time we feel so sorry for ourselves because we don’t look like what we’ve been told is ideal,
so concerned with being fucking pretty that you don’t care about being pretty fucking cool
honestly, I can campaign against vanity as much as i want but, sometimes, if i look closely into the mirror i still get a little insecure about the veins in my forehead.
even the moon has acne scars, and opinions on the love lives of her favorite stars.

that is why we must spread the truth like a plague that makes a third eye grow from your forehead and then you fade out of existence with a smile on your face that says “Oh, i get it!” we are a team, 7 billion strong, of dying people on a dying planet. Someday, we will band together to sustain the human race by boldly going where only sir patrick stewart and homies have gone before!!!!!
alas, that dream is for naught. on december 21st, 2012,  the four horsemen will ride across the planet leaving chem trails in their wake, stirring up demons who stomp out cataclysmic, california sinking earthquakes. and the illuminati will use black magic to hurdle planet nibiru straight into the white house, and quetzlcoatl will spiral down from the heavens with the anti-christ on his back, who’s simultaneously fucking the virgin mary while playing slayer on his double necked guitar, summoning a caravan of grey aliens from their corner of the galaxy like an intergalactic pied piper, each of them dropping nuclear warheads on every single human besides the good christian folk that already raptur’d.

we are dying
we are dying
we are dying
maybe if i repeat that enough it will lose it’s meaning
we are dying
we are dying
we are dying
and then, maybe, we can just pass this truth by,
like a homeless man with a sign that says:
“i just want $$$ 4 booze.”
we are dying
we are dying
we are dying

but don’t you dare try to tell me when or how
you’re just projecting photographs on the wall of alternate dimensions in which you lead the ideal life,
and that’s cool and all man but we both know the grass is always greener in the other slides.
ch-k

no, my friends,
no truth is absolute. except that we are all dying and our world is too. 
sure the world is ending. it’s been ending since it began.
it’s the apocalypse now, and always.